"To Go Against One's Conscience Is Neither Safe Nor Right. Here I stand. I Cannot Do Otherwise."....Martin Luther

Cracked But Not Broken

A friend once used the term "Cracked But Not Broken". Wow, how appropriate when describing "going through". It is amazing how God allows us to "go through" and despite any nicks or cracks, we are not broken. It isn't until we are older and wiser that we can appreciate the scars and memories of how we over came.

When we come across furniture that has fine cracks, it is said to have character and value. We classify it as an antique. The term antique has this unspoken value attached to it. When I look at my grandmother, who I love and adore, I appreciate her value. She will often speak of her life. I marvel at her tenacity, courage, resilience, spunk, and her unapologetic attitude towards life. Her wrinkles, her furrows across her forehead, her slow methodical movements and her quick agile sharp mind are unapproachable. Her sense of humor is contagious. Her love for her family is unquestionable. Her stories of hardship are heart wrenching, but through it all she made it through., "Cracked But Not Broken".

I besiege you, my queens, to not allow your situation to break you. Take these moments of darkness and emptiness and learn the lessons from these experiences. Take with you the wherewith all not to allow yourself to fall victim to the same dark and empty experience again.

Oh, you will have some cracks and bruises. Some will dissipate with time but others will remain to remind us of that place and our struggle to remove ourselves from that place. Just remember and call out the name of Jesus, our mothers, sisters, aunts, grandmothers and other women of yesteryears who are no longer here and our sisters who are here now. Reach out for that unwavering and never ending presence of God, for those cracks are like the imperfect circles that are used to count the years of a tree, they are like the beauty of our graying hairs to signify grace, wisdom, experience, and fortitude.

Remember the challenge of repairing a crack is far less challenging than the repair of something broken.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"The Worst the News, the More Effort Should Go Into Communicating It."....Andrew s. Grove, CEO, Intel Corp

Communication Between Men and Women

"Good Communication is as Stimulating as Black Coffee, and Just as Hard to Sleep After."....

Anne Morrow Lindbergh

It seems so simple, words between two people of the opposite sex, communication. The definition, the exchange of ideas, conveyance of information. In fact, this simple form of relaying and conveying thoughts, ideas, and feelings has proven, over the decades, to be difficult, arduous, painstaking, complicated, misconstrued, argumentative and disastrous.

I am the first to admit that at my age (hey hey), I refuse to mince words and to internalize how I feel. If communication is the expressive tools to convey how I feel then I am expressing. I have never sought to be malicious and combative (well sometimes). I do attempt to be thought provoking and insightful to my state of mind at that particular time. I believe when approaching a sensitive matter, you should be very careful of how and what you say. At the same time, one should be convincing and compelling of his/her thoughts.

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Communication mixed with today's savvy technology lends numerous ways of communicating without direct interaction with each other. I really find this to be cowardice and shallow. I too have used these forms of communication. I really loath this impersonal form of communicating. I find these forms of communication to be used as a veil or a shield of deception, untruths, manipulation and lies. Men and women are already saddled with the hurdles of truthful, meaningful and honest communication, why add to the burden.

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I have met several men in the past year and all rely heavily on texting, emailing, twitter, facebook or other blog sites. While I realize that these forms of communication play a significant role in our society, I hate that it has taken the place of true meaningful dialogue between men and women. These forms of communication can never place hearing the tone of how a voice changes when responding to a question or how a person pauses when he/she is trying to formulate a response. Hearing a person voice gives the listener insight to the state of mind of that person talking.

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I take a stand today. As a queen, I will no longer accept anything other than ear to ear or face to face communication when discussing personal matters with someone of the opposite sex. Queens no longer allow a man to leave a texted message explaining why he did not show up for a date or mail you explaining why he is breaking up with you. I expect the same treatment from you queens. Let us regain some resemblance of normalcy and honesty in our interaction with the opposite sex. Don't allow complacency and not wanting to chase a man away when we demand to be treated "right and descent".

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Peace and Blessings,

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Tracey ReNissa

"We're All Born Under The Same Sky, But We Don't All Have The Same Horizon."...Konrad Adenauer..

What Are You Seeking In A Relationship And What Are You Willing To Give Of Yourself In A Relationship?

As a woman in my forties, there are certain expectations, desires and standards that I believe I am entitled to. This is not an entitlement of selfishness or greed. It is an entitlement that I have as a queen seeking my king who is deservant of me, an entitlement as a child of God, and a righteousness that is entitled to me based on the Word of God. It is an entitlement that tells me that I want and deserve the best that life has to give me and in return I will reciprocate these same virtues and qualities to my King.

I seek first and foremost a man that is a child of God. I seek an honorable man that stumbles with flaws. This man with imperfections realizes that he is imperfect but strives to better himself and his family. For this man is not perfect but perfect for me. I seek my strong African American man that places no one before me but Our Lord and Saviour. I seek this strong outspoken man that cradles me in my moments of despair, my moments of tiredness and my moments of weakness. And with this spirit of outspokenness there is this quiet storm that is able to discern the situation and time to be outspoken vs. a quiet storm. The spirit of discernment is important to a man of leadership and authority. My king has a swagga that he owns and can never be duplicated. I seek a man that has Love for only me. His heart is too selfish to wander away from me, his true love. This man of God places his wife and family first. I seek a provider, a warrior, and a protector. This man of my, works endlessly and tirelessly to provide the essentials for his family. I seek a man that radiates self-confidence but needs not to be boastful and conceited. This man of my takes pride in his appearance. Are you that man for me.

As your queen, I take my role and place as your queen seriously. I place no one above you but my Lord and Saviour. I will stay by your side during all times. I will honor you both publicly and privately. I will never emasculate who you are. As your queen, my position is to feed and nourish you spiritually, physically and mentally. I am that voice of reason when you have doubts and concerns. I am that shelter when you need to be shielded. I am that queen confident enough to walk in your shadow without losing who I am. I am that queen that is sure of my position and role in your life and heart to allow you to be you. I am the mother of our children. I am your check and balance. I am your confidant. Most importantly, I am your perfect queen, not perfect in God's creation but perfect for you.

Do you know what you are seeking in a relationship and what are you willing to give in a relationship? My queens and kings take the time today to answer today's topic honestly.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"How a man plays the game shows something of his character; how he loses shows all of it."....Camden County, Georgia Tribune

Are Women Encouraging to Each Other, Are We Soul Builders, Emotion Menders, Uplifting In Each Others Endeavors Or Are We "Haters" Of The Game, Destroyers Of Encouragement, Or The Grim Reaper Of Dreams

Wow, take a look within before you commit to an answer. Can you honestly say that you are a positive uplifting spirit to the sistahood?

In my life, it has always been the kind and soothing encouragement of a woman that has inspired me and has motivated me to reach higher and to achieve greater. My mother was so encouraging and helpful to me that her loss was emotionally and spiritually devastating for me. I later had the kindness of my mother in-law. The commonalities that we share as women are much greater than our differences.

Our vanity, jealousy, competitiveness, greed, and our sense of loss of who we are as women, can monstrously and negatively cause adverse encounters with other women. This leads to fragmented and purulent infested relationships between women. Our inability to set aside our differences are at times crippling.

Together and united, I believe that a lot of the ills of our society would no longer exist. Women have always been the villagers helping to raise our children. We need to recapture that bond of oneness. We stand on the shoulders of great women who have paved the paths to greatness for us. I stand on the shoulders of our sisters like, Shirley Lofton, Oprah, Shirley Chishom, Noreen, Terry, Michelle Obama, Susan Taylor, Susan Depasse, Beyonce, Diana Ross, Mother Theresa, Liza, Marie and the list is endless.

When the opportunity presents itself, avail yourself to be a becon of light, a pillar of strength and a spirit of encouragement.

Who’s On My Guest List?

When you give a feast, invite the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind. And you will be blessed. —Luke 14:13-14

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"Most of Us, Swimming against the Tides of Trouble the World Knows Nothing About, Need Only a Bit of Praise or Encouragement - and We'll Make the Goal

Is It Worth the Efforts and Struggles?

I often imagine what would life be like if???? If I no longer had the struggles of financial worries, if I was not always on my hustle trying to figure out the best situation for my children and I, and if I didn't have to contend with all the other bullshit of life?

I guess I'm coming from a dark place today, but I still put God first and I constantly remind myself that without Him there would be no me.

Queens, it's okay to vent and to take time to reflect, but at the end of the day when the light seems to be the dimmest and there is no one around to encourage you, God has your back. And when that light bulb has been replaced and the path that God has purposed for your life is lit, you can rest assure that the efforts and the struggles were well worth it.

When your purpose in life becomes clouded with doubt, this is the time that we should hold on fast to the Word. Allow your faith to become your crutch and your source of inspiration. I too, have my moments of self doubt, but never doubting the Word of God. So when that voice of uncertainty whispers into our ears, fill your minds and hearts with the Word of God.

Oh, the answer to what would my life be like without all that stuff those distractions, it would be void of God the Father and Our Lord, Jesus Christ. It is because of this stuff that I run to the comfort and safety of my God, it is because of this stuff that I know my Savior, my God is the Alpha and the Omega, it is because of this stuff that I find refuge in my Father and Spritual Healer.

Trust in Him during those dark times and all of the times.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

Psalm 37:4 "Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart."

"We're All Born Under The Same Sky, but We Don't All Have the Same Horizon."....Konrad Adenauer

Apple Shaped Vs. Pear Shaped

Did you ever think that your shape has the hidden answers to your health concerns, your ability to lose weight and the best way to lose weight based on your shape? Well yes, your shape holds the answers to these questions.

The way your body is shaped determines how and where it stores fat. When it comes to body shapes, we all fall under two basic categories, we are either Apple shaped or Pear shaped.

Apple shaped women who gain weight around their middle are more likely to develop disorders like heart disease, diabetes, or breast cancer. You are most likely characterized as having larger breasts, smaller hips, larger waist and a protruding belly. Excess fat tends to store around your breast, waist, stomach and internal organs(heart, liver, kidneys and intestines). It is the fat surrounding these internal organs that put apple-shaped individuals at a greater health risk than those that are Pear-shaped. Apple shaped individuals are at greater risk for health problems because of abdominal fat is more harmful than the fate that is stored under the skin. This fat storage increases the chances of developing metabolism problems, type 2 diabetes, stroke, high blood pressure and heart disease, as well as, developing breast and endometrial cancer

Pear shaped who add pounds around their hips, but and thighs are more susceptible to problems like osteoporosis, varicose veins, cellulite, and eating disorders. They are more prone to lower self-esteem due to a poor body image and likely to have a rough transition through menopause. They are characterized as having a lower metabolism, a smaller upper body with a heavier lower body (hips, buttocks, legs). They are more likely to store fate under the skin, buttocks, thighs and hips. Pear shaped women also have less androgen (male hormone effect that strengthens bones), and at menopause, their pear-fat makes much weaker estrogen, which is not strong enough to keep calcium in the bones. At menopause when women lose estrogen they lose bone. As apple fat continues to produce estrogen, keeping the bones stronger during menopause.

Diets and exercise tips for apple and pear shaped women. Apple shaped women exercises should include performing medium to high cardiovascular exercises like aerobics, and strength-training for at least 2-3 times a week. Their diets should include "good" proteins like eggs, soy, salmon, halibut, trout, beans, and fiber filled foods. They slow digestion of sugars, lower insulin and cholesterol levels and lower risk of heart disease and diabetes.

Pear shaped women exercises should include resistance training to strengthen their bones. It is advised to perform early morning workouts to help boost your metabolism. Walking, rope jumping and aerobics are suggested. To help tone the body, it advisable to do strength training exercises at a moderate pace at least 4 to 5 times a week. Their diets should include more complex carbs like fruits, vegetables, brown rice and whole grains; while moderately eating healthy proteins like tuna, salmon, turkey and lean beef. Foods that should be avoided include meat with fatty parts, whole salad dressings, regular milk, cheese, butter and sour creams.

Discovering your body type is definitely a first step in paying attention to your diet and figuring out what works for you. True weight-loss is only achieved through proper nutrition and exercise, so don't forget to consult your physician before you begin a new diet, and be sure to supplement your meals with the right vitamins.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"Thought Is The Original Source."....W. Clement Stone

The Importance of Water Regarding Health

"I'm dying of thirst!" Well according to studies you very well could be dying without a healthy daily intake of water. Water is two parts hydrogen, one part oxygen. But this element, better known as water, is the most essential, next to air, to our survival.

Water makes up more than two thirds of the weight of the human body, and without it, humans would die in a few days. The human brain is made up of 95% water, blood is 82% and lungs 90%. A mere 2% drop in our body's water supply can trigger signs of dehydration: fuzzy short-term memory, trouble with basic math, and difficulty focusing on smaller print, such as a computer screen. Mild dehydration is also one of the most common causes of daytime fatigue. An estimated seventy-five percent of Americans have mild, chronic dehydration.

The mechanics of the human body depend heavily on water. The body cannot work without it, just as a car cannot run without gas and oil. Here are some of the functions of water.

1. Water serves as a lubricant

2. Water forms the base for saliva

3. Water forms the fluids the surround the joints

4. Water regulates the body temperature, as the cooling and heating is distributed through perspiration

5. Water helps to alleviate constipation by moving food through the intestinal tract and thereby eliminating waste - the best detox agent.

6. Regulates metoblism

7. 75% of Americans are chronically dehydrated

8. In 37% of Americans, the thirst mechism is so weak that it is often mistaken for hunger.

9. The biggest trigger of daytime fatigue is lack of water

10 Preliminary research indicates that 8-10 glasses of water could ease back and joint pain for up to 80% of suffers.

In addition to the daily maintenance of our bodies, water also plays a key role in the prevention of disease. Drinking eight glasses of water daily can decrease the risk of colon cancer by 45%, bladder cancer by 50% and it can potentially even reduce the risk of breast cancer. And those are just a few examples! As you follow other links on our website, you can read more in depth about how water can aid in the prevention and cure of many types of diseases, ailments and disorders that affect the many systems of our bodies.

The Tuesday's health blog topic of the day is to be used as a source of initial introduction to a health issue or to reinforce what knowledge you may already have. This information should not be used as a medical substitute from the sound and professional advice that your physician can offer you. For additional information, please log onto websites: www.watershed.net/water-importance.htm and www.freedrinkingwater.com/water.../water-health.htm

Peace and Blessings

Tracey ReNissa

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Boldness, Arrogance, Self-confidence, and Reassurance

Queens, I wrote a small blurb on July 4Th. I mentioned that on this day of Independence, we should allow our boldness, arrogance, self-confidence, and reassurance to illuminate. These attributes, when used skillfully and with balance, without brassiness, boastfulness and negativeness can attract people to you like a bee to honey.

There should always be a balance in our lives. Part of this balance is knowing our source. For me that source is God. Whenever there is confusion and chaos in my life, I can rely on the Word to bring balance in every facet of my life.

Proclaim your Independence and Freedom with boldness, arrogance, self-confidence and reassurance. I proclaim them with the promise from God. Psalm 37:4 "Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart."

I challenge you today to place your desires to your source and with boldness, arrogance, self-confidence and reassurance to receive your heart's desires.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

Happy 4Th of July

As you know, I only blog Monday - Friday but, today I wanted to say to my Queens, use this day as a milestone and marker of your Independence and freedom. I, too, must adhere to my own words of advice. Forge ahead with boldness, self-confidence, arrogance, reassurance and the knowledge that you are God's child with more Blessings than the stars above.

Happy Rebirth Day,

Tracey ReNissa

"Imagination Is The Highest Kite One Can Fly."....Lauren Bacall

Do You Know How To Please Yourself And Do You Enjoy Your Body And The Pleasure Of Self Intimacy

Queens this is "Me" time. Release, relax and here we go! I have not been able to get this topic in for some time. I have had this topic on my agenda for quite some time but something would prevent me from exploring this topic and sharing it with you. I so look forward to our Friday discussions. This is our grown ass women time. Our time to really get in touch with ourselves (in this case pun intended).

I plan on taking you on a sexual odyssey today. One you won't soon forget. Okay it is imperative that you have squirreled yourself away from the rest of the world. Did you pick out your favorite music, candles, toys, and whatever else you may need to set the mood.

The first thing we need to do is get the technical stuff out of the way. How does the clitoris work in respect to sexual pleasurement. The cloritis is a bundle of nerves about the size of a pea located at the top of a woman's vulva, above the urethral opening. It is very sensitive and is responsibile for feelings of sexual pleasure when stimulated. The clitoris plays a significant role in orgasms, and can produce orgasms with or without sexual penetration. For me, I have 4 erotic zones. For each woman this number may vary. I will share with you my erotic zones: my mouth, my breast, my clitoris and my anus. In order of most pleasurable, my clitoris, my anus, my mouth and then my breasts. I will share with you some of my deep and intimate secrets and I hope this will give you insight to something different and pleasurable.

I have discovered that I am my greatest sexual pleaser. I am not afraid to explore my body. I have often taken a mirror to look at my clitoris and my anus. Haven't I said before that you must be aware of your body, Queens, and what better way to know You then by taste, touch and sight. Have you often wonder what turns your man on when he is down there moaning and groaning and swearing to the heavens that this is best Shit he has ever had. Has he ever told you how good looking your clit is? Has he raved about the taste of your juices? Well this weekend find out the answer to these questions.

I can remember having sexual orgasms at an early age. I didn't know, then, that the term for this sexual high was masturbation. I would lye in my bed as a teenager and have dreams about my favorite boy in school or back then Michael Jackson or Billy D. Willaims while touching myself. I can remember, for me, it was the slow and steady strokes that I delivered to my clitoris that resulted in the most pleasurable climax for me. I can also remember this overwhelming feeling of euphoria (of course I didn't know anything about an euphoria) and being wet after this experience. For some reason, I was never ashamed or felt that I had done something wrong. Now that I am a mother, educator, and role model for my children, I believe that allowing my children to develope and to know about their sexual being is just as important as developing their academic achievements.

This art of masturbation is not just for the single and I don't have anyone right now ladies. This art of self gratification is for everyone to experience. I truly believe that knowing how to pleasusre yourself truly enhances your sexual encounters with your mate. More importantly, this is an opportunity for you to become familiar with this sexual side of yourself. Know that there are no limits to the sexual pleasures that you can derive from yourself and from others when you are at one with who you are.

Start today, touch yourself. feel the electricity surge through your body. Taste the sweetness of your juices. Lastly, take the hand mirror and explore your body. Become acquainted today with "You". If your man is away for a few days and you have the urge to get it on, try it. If you are preparing for an erotic and sexually fulfilling evening with someone special, set the mood. When he enters you and you are sloppy wet see the excitment in his eyes and take notice how his love making will seem different and definitively better.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"Vision Is The Art Of Seeing The Invisible."....Jonathan Swift

Loving Yourself

Loving yourself brings a healthy, self confident and strong woman. Loving yourself is paramount in our quest to be a better mother, daughter, wife, and friend.

Once we allow ourselves to be the potential that God has intended us to be, we can be the best mother, wife, daughter, and friend. Loving yourself will place us in that space of peace, tranquility, and happiness. We will no longer depend on others to bring the satisfaction of happiness and fulfillment of life.

I would love sharing my life with that special someone. I long for the day that a man will understand my wants, my attributes, my worth, my weaknesses, my soul, my hopes, my fears, and my dreams. But I refuse to give any man that gift of me when they are not worthy.

I recently met a man that I wanted to believe was worthy of me. I knew that he was not the one but I wanted so badly to have someone in my life. I ignored the obvious. I ignored my need for self esteem, self respect and love for myself. When we negate these things we sell a piece of our soul. We rationalize how he makes us feel, we tell stories of those rare and far and in between times that he shows a glimmer of kindness and consideration. We use God and the Bible as your source of why you should stay with this man and again we chip away at our ability to stand in the mirror and recognize the strong, gifted, caring and loving person that God wants us to be.

I had to stand in front of the mirror of reality and the person staring back at me was unrecognizable. It is okay to love but don't allow that love to change that person you once held up to high standards and high esteem. Don't allow this love to separate you and your family and friends. Now, you may say that your love for this man is your business and no one else's, you are fooling yourself. This is the man that has treated you wrongly and badly and now that you are in love again. you want everyone to back off and to accept your decision to love this man. Well. this can be done. but. at a price. Don't be surprised when those love ones decide to remove themselves from this chaotic and disturbing relationship.

Queens, today take the time to look into this mirror of reality. Do you recognize the person in the mirror. Love yourself and when you do this you will be living up to the potential that God has designed for you and that man, that should love you unconditionally, will be there for you.

Do you have a story of when you did not love yourself first and unconditionally and allowed the love of man to take priority? And when did you realize the need of this man over shadowed self love and how did you take your life back?"

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"It Is Not So Much How Busy You Are, But Why You Are Busy. The Bee Is Praised. The Mosquito Is Swatted."

The Signs and Risk Factors of Ovarian Cancer

Hi Queens, it has been a while. Life doesn't always allow you to plan and carry through those plans. So when you zig instead of zag, go with the flow and adapt. But don't allow this deterrent to dominant your true course in life. Queens, it is Tuesday which is health care day and the topic is Ovarian Caner.

What are the ovaries and the purpose of the ovaries? The ovaries are part of a woman's reproductive system. The ovaries make the female hormones -- estrogen and progesterone. They also release eggs. An egg travels from an ovary through a fallopian tube to the womb (uterus). When a woman goes through her "change of life" (menopause), her ovaries stop releasing eggs and make far lower levels of hormones.

How does the start of cancer happen? Experts have discovered that the proliferation of cancer is started with a mutated cells. Normally, cells grow and divide to form new cells as the body needs them. When cells grow old, they die, and new cells take their place. Sometimes, this orderly process goes wrong. New cells form when the body does not need them, and old cells do not die when they should. These extra cells can form a mass of tissue called a growth or tumor.

Every growth/tumor is not malignant. These tumors can be benign which is not life threatening. These tumors can be removed and they usually do not grow back. The tumors do not invade the tissues around them. Cells from benign tumors do not spread to other parts of the body.

Malignant tumors are cancerous. They can be life threatening. Malignant tumors often can be removed. But sometimes they grow back. Malignant tumors can invade and damage nearby tissues and organs. Cells from malignant tumors can spread to other parts of the body. Cancer cells spread by breaking away from the original (primary) tumor and entering the lymphatic system or bloodstream. The cells invade other organs and form new tumors that damage these organs. The spread of cancer is called metastasis.

Cancer cells can spread through the lymphatic system to lymph nodes in the pelvis, abdomen, and chest. Cancer cells may also spread through the bloodstream to organs such as the liver and lungs. When cancer spreads from its original place to another part of the body, the new tumor has the same kind of abnormal cells and the same name as the original tumor. For example, if ovarian cancer spreads to the liver, the cancer cells in the liver are actually ovarian cancer cells. The disease is metastatic ovarian cancer, not liver cancer. For that reason, it is treated as ovarian cancer, not liver cancer. Doctors call the new tumor "distant" or metastatic disease.

The risk factors associated with ovarian cancer are: Family history of cancer such as a mother, sister, or daughter with ovarian cancer. Also, women with a family history of cancer of the breast, uterus, colon, or rectum may also have an increased risk of ovarian cancer. Personal history of cancer namely breast, colon or rectum cancer has a higher risk factor of developing ovarian cancer. Age women over the age of 55. Most women over 55 are diagnosed with ovarian cancer. Never pregnant, older women who have never been pregnant have a increased risk of ovarian cancer. Menopausal hormone therapy: Some studies have suggested that women who take estrogen by itself (estrogen without progesterone) for 10 or more years may have an increased risk of ovarian cancer.

Early ovarian cancer may not cause obvious symptoms. But, as the cancer grows, symptoms may include:

1. Pressure and pain to back, pelvis, abdomen and/or legs

2. A swollen or bloated abdomen

3. Nausea, indigestion, gas, constipation, or diarrhea

Less common symptoms are:

1. Shortness of breath

2. Felling the need to urinate often

3. Unusual vaginal bleeding (heavy periods, or bleeding after menopause)

There are several means of diagnosing ovarian cancer. They are pelvic exam, ultra sound, blood test, physical exam, or biopsy.

Queens, it is so important that we utilize our primary care physicians, specialized physicians and health care facilities to stay in tune with your health. Preventative measures and early detection are imperative to a positive outcome to concern ovarian cancer and other health scares.

The Tuesday's health blog topic of the day is to be used as a source of initial introduction to a health issue or to reinforce what knowledge you may already have. This information should not be used as a medical substitute from the sound and professional advice that your physician can offer you. For additional information, please log onto http://www.medicinenet.com/.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"A Lot Of People Are Lonely Because They Build Walls Instead of Bridges."...Anonymous

Learning to connect and network women to women

Why is it so difficult for women to break the ice between one another. Studies have shown that men are so much better at initiating conversation and networking with each other. We are the most powerful group of consumers and women entrepreneurship is the fastest growing sector in the business world. I find it odd that we allow pettiness and insecurities from building and forging meaningful relationships with other women.

I have made a pact with myself to initiate and exchange information with a new person at least once or twice a week. I find the more often you expose yourself to this type of communication, it improves your communication skills, as well as, your self-confidence. I have discovered some interesting information and hopefully I have gained a friend that I may not talk with everyday but a contact that I can utilize or that I can pass on to someone else more suitable to use the contact and/or information.

Do you have any recent experiences good, bad or indifferent with initiating and connecting with another woman. When we come together with our differences and commonalities we unearth our own uniqueness. Again, become a beacon of light for someone today. A simple smile can be the deterrent that saves a life. Allow the goodness in you to radiate and to shine more brilliantly outside.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

Remember the month of June is dedicated to our Queens and the growth of new and established entrepreneurs. Join us this month in promoting and encouraging growing budding businesses. May your happiness, wealth, and health blossom with the Right Hand of God allowing the blessings from above to fall at your feet boundlessly. With these blessings be prepared to Bless

the next Queen with her God given and entitled Blessings.

"Submit yourselves for the Lord's sake to every authority instituted among men: whether to the king, as the supreme authority,"...1 Peter 2:13

What Does It Mean To Be Submissive In A Relationship

Queens, I thought I would take it there with this question. Does your attitude, demeanor, spirit, or your life style allow you to be submissive to your partner. Okay the juice is flowing now. I used the term partner but should that submissiveness only be gifted to that special man that has earned the title "Husband". Because whether you choose to believe it or not there is a difference in a partner and a "Husband". Okay back to the original question. Are you ready to be submissive to your partner/husband?

Oh Queens, let me initiate and instigate here. You independent, money making, house buying, jewelry wearing, Prada, Marc Jacob, Louis Vuitton, Gucci, YST, designer loving, I don't need any man, I can get it on my own sistahs, are you sure you can give the deserving man that comes into your life that honor of leader and head of the household? Queens you are stepping into a different rim of uncomfortability here when you relinquish your independence and your privilege and sense of entitlement because I earned it mentality.

I too have had the dubious and daunting responsibility of holding down a household, children, bills and a lifestyle that I have grown quite accustom to. I have called all the shots. I am the shot caller baller around here. I am the Mr and the Mrs. I have the sleepless nights of wondering how I could and would meet the mortgage again, which credit card should I pay , how little can I get away with putting down on an utility bill. Oh yes, my sistahs, I have been driving the 18 wheeler by myself for sometime. And the question, that I pose to myself, are you ready to be submissive, Tracey ReNissa. I say resoundingly, Hell yeah. My current position as head of household was not because of a controlling domineering spirit. It was dropped into my lap, I was forced into this role as a rapist forces his will onto his victim. Those words are strong but I say them with conviction and resentment. Resentment because the man that I was with did not allow me to be the submissive wife that God willed me to be.

Now I need to go to church here with you Queens. Before you can claim submissiveness, you need to know the origin, the purpose and the role that God has ordained for you as a wife. See here we go with partner vs. wife/husband. We need the gift of discernment to recognize a good man (Godly man). Reference 1 Peter 3: 1-6. "Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 4Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 5For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, 6like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear."

Queens, check yourself. Prepare yourselves, know yourselves and understand the origin and role that you have been destined and ordained for since you were a child. I believe the title of submissiveness will and does come naturally when we place ourselves in God's Holy order. Equally important Queens, we need to dress, walk, possess and embody the spirit of entitlement of submissiveness. A man recognizes a woman who is of God. I too fall short of showing and manifesting these virtuous qualities. I recently allowed my desires to please a man to compromise my standards and to dictate what I realize and know to be true and Godly. Needless to say that situation didn't last. Be true to you and believe me when you place God first and yourself second, there will be order and peace in your life.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

Read 1 Peter 2: 13 and John 5:24

"If You Add To The Truth, You Subtract from It."...The Talmud

Fibromyalgia Signs and Symptoms

Have you been to numerous doctor's visits and have had countless tests. The doctors are stumped and completely clueless about the reason and origin of your pain and fatigue. You are starting to question your sanity. Well there may be an answer to this mysterious illness. Have you hear of Fibromyalgia. Yes, Fibromyalgia.

Fibromyalgia is a chronic condition characterized by widespread pain in your muscles, ligaments and tendons, as well as fatigue and multiple tender points — places on your body where slight pressure causes pain.

Women are more likely to develop Fibromyalgia and there is a smaller percentage of men diagnosed with Fibromyalgia. Nearly 2 percent of people of the United States are affected by this disorder. Fibromyalgia symptoms often begin after a physical or emotional trauma, but in many cases there appears to be no triggering event.

Signs and symptoms of fibromyalgia can vary, depending on the weather, stress, physical activity or even the time of day. The pain associated with Fibromyalgia is described as a constant dull ache, typically arising from muscles. To be considered widespread, the pain must occur on both sides of your body and above and below your waist. Fibromyalgia is characterized by additional pain when firm pressure is applied to specific areas of your body, called tender points. Tender point locations include:

Back of the head
Between shoulder blades
Top of shoulders
Front sides of neck
Upper chest
Outer elbows
Upper hips
Sides of hips
Inner knees

Other symptoms of Fibromyalgia are sleep disturbance, depression, endometriosis, Irritable bowel syndrome, Rheumatoid arthritis, Restless leg syndrome, and Lupus.

Doctors have not discovered the cause root of Fibromyalgia. There are some links that they believe are cross links. They are major infections, genetics, physical or emotional trauma.

Why does Fibromyalgia hurt? One theory is that people with fibromyalgia have a lower threshold for pain because of increased sensitivity in the brain to pain signals. Researchers believe repeated nerve stimulation causes the brains of people with fibromyalgia to change. This change involves an abnormal increase in levels of certain chemicals in the brain that signal pain (neurotransmitters). In addition, the brain's pain receptors seem to develop a sort of memory of the pain and become more sensitive, meaning they can overreact to pain signals.

Because of Fibromyalgia's vague symptoms, it is imperative to be vigilant in monitoring your health and knowing what precipitated or exacerbated any sudden changes. You are your main advocate. Become aware of your body and changes that may plague your body.

The Tuesday's health blog topic of the day is to be used as a source of initial introduction to a health issue or to reinforce what knowledge you may already have. This information should not be used as a medical substitute from the sound and professional advice that your physician can offer you. If this topic is of interest to you and you would like to research more information the link is http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/fibromyalgia/DS00079.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"Dreams - There Are No Rules Of Architecture For A Castle In The Clouds."...G.K. Chesterton

Mothers and Daughters Relationship

I have the dubious honors of being the recipient of the titles Mother and Daughter. Both titles carry their own distinct responsibilities and roles. I once thought that my role as a mother was the most fulfilling and rewarding of the two titles. This comment is not to slight mothers and their huge responsibilities as parents.

My mother passed several years ago. The loss of my mother's love, guidance, and inspiration has definitely impacted my relationships with my daughters. At times, I become too overwhelmed in my feelings of abandonment, grieve, and self pity. I often resent being in a relationship, as the mother, where your love, kindness, caring, and warmth are not equally reciprocated. I only hope that I can be the mother to my daughters that my mother was to me.

These blissful and joyous relationships can, at times, become volatile and disruptive during their teenage years. You at your best try to allow them (daughters) to grow and to mature into vibrant young ladies. I see the uniqueness in each of my daughters. It is difficult, at times, to maintain a relationship of mother and daughter and not their girlfriend. I can be your friend but the line of respect should be fostered and maintained. I welcome the opportunity to have my daughters to feel the comfort of openness. I want them to feel safe and to have the freedom to voice their opinion and concerns in a healthy manner. With all the disappointments and up's and down's, I love them unconditionally. I love them with the spirit of forgiveness, happiness, strength, empowerment and grace. I vicariously see life through them and I pray with optimism and hope for a better life for me as well as for Bria and Mya.

As we, the mothers, advance in age there is this natural metamorphosis or evolution that God in his infinite wisdom allows to take place where our roles and responsibilities shifts. If raised properly, the once young and innocent daughter with the pigtails and smiles take on the more dominate role. The transition is so subtle and benign that it is not obviously apparent to all parties involved. Until the day, when you are the one deciding where she will live, how her bills are paid and making vital health care decisions concerning your mother. When faced with these life altering tasks, remember the times that she wiped away your tears, promised you everything would be alright, sacrificed herself for your future. These are days that I will not have to share with my mother. So if you are so blessed to enter into this phase, cherish it. Never make her to feel like a burden and maintain her dignity and self respect.

If there is a splintered relationship between mother and daughter always remember there will never be too many times to heal the past and to relish and to rejoice in the future. I was once told that God gives us a mother because of the unconditioned love that she has for you. This is the closes experience of His love in the now and physical on Earth that you will ever experience until that day that you and Him are together.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"The Will To Do, The Soul To Dare."

Transition....

Transition, a ten letter word. What does it mean? Passage from one place, condition, or state to another; change. Does your life call for transition, change or a new passage?

Queens embrace change. Embrace the opportunity to express yourself, find that happiness that you dream of. I recently stopped working one of two jobs. I was working 76 hours a week. I did this for seven years. Events happened that pretty much forced me to take stock of my life and the insane schedule that I was maintaining. After evaluating and reevaluating my circumstances, I realized that this was the best decision for me. This decision has now allowed me to spend more time with my children, to focus on my blog, and my interest and business venture in mobile spa.

I'm not saying that this does not come without sacrifice, belief, and faith. The loss of that job is a substantial financial difference in my life. I believe the blessings that God has in store for me will out weigh any financial loss that I may experience.

Starting today, starting now queens, evaluate your life's choices. Embrace transition, change and a new passage.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"It Is Better To Be Making The News Than Taking It; To Be An Actor Rather Than A Critic."....Winston Churchill

Women Empowerment

Queens, the other week I participated in a Girl Power Market Place in New Jersey. The event was the creative efforts of Essential Details. The proprietor, Tracie Henry. I had my 10 and 15 year old daughters to accompany me. I participated as a vendor, Tracey ReNissa Mobile Spa.

There were several vendors there with their products. This was an opportunity that enabled a group of women to gather, to network, and to reconnect with old friends.

For the month of June, I am inviting my Queens to submit their information i.e. websites, phone numbers, and other pertinent information about their businesses. I dedicate this month to us to promote our businesses. Queens take advantage of this opportunity to share, help others and grow your businesses.

I am a firm believer that once one person is blessed the next person in line will be blessed. Stand in line and await your blessings.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"Never mistake motion for action."...Ernest Hemingway

The Return Of The Queen

All hail to the Queens. I have been away for a minute. I am back with renewed determination, vigor, vitality and blessings. There have been some changes in my life in the past few weeks that can be termed "life defining and altering". I became self absorb with life. I have this saying "I just became so consumed with life that I stopped living. This, to me, is the worst form of existing especially when you have the will, opportunity, and the God given ability to make changes and live a vibrant and productive life.

I allowed myself to worry about tomorrow while I was firmly cemented in today. I have given myself permission to breath and to allow God to direct and to guide my life. I am submissive to God's will. This is a hugh leap of faith and belief. On a daily basis I have to readjust and reassure myself that God has my back. I was at a point in my life that I really did not have a choice but to make changes. I truly believe that if I did not submit and cease with the insane existence that I was maintaining and living, my children, my friends, and my life would all soon become a part of my history.

I celebrate my life today as a rebirth. Queens help me celebrate my rebirth, my renewed beginning. Stroll with me with renewed confidence, assurance, and boldness.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

Warning Signs Of Myocardial Infarction (Heart Attack)In Women

It's been realized for some time that women are just as likely as men to have a heart attack (myocardial infarction, or MI); however, the classical signs described by men aren't always reported by women. Coronary heart disease remains the primary cause of death in women in the USA.

Prodromal (precursory) symptoms were reported by 95% of the women. The most frequent ones, reported one month before their MI, were unusual fatigue (71%), sleep disturbance (48%), shortness of breath (42%), indigestion (39%), and anxiety (36%). The majority of these (over 80%) were rated as severe or moderate. One or more of these prodromal symptoms occurred daily or several times a week, for at least a month before the MI, in 75% of the women experiencing them.

Unlike men, only 30% of the women reported chest discomfort, which could be aching, tightness, pressure, sharp, burning, fullness or tingling.

On average, 7 acute symptoms were reported by each woman. Women with more prodromal symptoms had more acute symptoms. The most frequent were shortness of breath (58%), weakness (55%), fatigue (43%), cold sweat (39%), and dizziness (39%).
As many as 43% of the women had no chest pain or discomfort whatsoever. Among those that did, the sensation was described as aching, tightness, or pressure, but not pain.

Myocardial infarction occurs due to narrowed or blocked coronary arteries. Coronary arteries lie on the surface of the heart and supply it with oxygen. The source of oxygen, however, may be altered if fatty deposits (plaque) are produced, causing atherosclerosis. Extensive atherosclerosis reduces blood flow to the heart, causing chest pain and shortness of breath.' In women, angina is often atypical and does not follow any recognizable pattern. Women with angina may just complain of a little neck ache, occasional pain in the back or breast, or tingling in the fingers.

The patient is usually restless, apprehensive, pale, diaphoretic, and in severe pain. The skin is usually cool, and peripheral or central cyanosis may be present. The pulse is thready and the blood pressure is variable; however, many patients initially have some degree of hypertension, unless cardiogenic shock is developing. Arrhythmia is common: bradycardia or extrasystoles may be observed early in the course of myocardial infarction. The heart sounds are usually somewhat distant; the presence of a fourth heart sound is almost universal.

Women may be misdiagnosed and sent home and not thoroughly investigated for coronary heart disease! Therefore, it is essential to investigate patients who present with any of the previously mentioned signs and symptoms.

Queens, are you predisposed to diabetes, heart disease, smoker, heavy drinker of alcohol, or high cholesterol. It is imperative for you to make an appointment with your PCP or cardiologist. Early detection and prevention is key in the survival rate in women. African American women are more likely to die from heart disease than their white counterparts.

I value my sistahs and their spirits. I besiege you to be vigilant and advocates of good health for yourself as well as your mothers, sistahs, aunts, grandmothers, neighbors, cousins, co-workers and any female you may know. Heart disease is avoidable, detectable, and preventable. Raise your self-awareness and become apart of the movement of good health and longevity. The Tuesday's health blog topic of the day is to be used as a source of initial introduction to a health issue or to reinforce what knowledge you may already have. This information should not be used as a medical substitute from the sound and professional advice that your physician can offer you. For more indepth information about this subject, please log on to website http://findarticles.com.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"If You're Going To Do Something Tonight That You'll Be Sorry For Tomorrow Morning, Sleep Late."....Henry Youngman

The Perfect Storm....Mental, Emotional, Physical, And Spiritual Breakdown

Hi Queens, some years ago there was a movie out called the "The Perfect Storm". This movie captured the fate of a vessel that was battered and beaten by a thunderstorm and a hurricane. Unfortunately, the story did not end well for the crew of the Andrea Gail vessel. I have recently, felt that I too have encountered "The Perfect Storm" but overcame. Unlike these characters, I knew where to go for refuge, I knew who was and is my Salvation, I knew that He would never leave or forsake me. Do you have Him in your life to calm the crushing waves of abuse, stress, and being overstretched. Have you ever been at that point in your life when all possible elements of your physical, emotional, psychological and spiritual fibers are simultaneously at the brinks of a breakdown?

Life is so unpredictable and overwhelming. If you are not grounded and steadfast in your believe that God will not put any more of you than you can bear, it is nearly impossible to think or fathom that you will be able to endure and to persevere during your "Perfect Storm".

It is so important that we allow and avail ourselves to each other to comfort, hold, and to embrace one another during our accomplishments, triumphs, victories, losses, set backs, and perfect storms. Queens, the ultimate Saviour and Rescuer is God. For every perfect storm that he allows in your life, I assure you He has designed a path and ending to all of your despair. For at the end of these perfect storms, you should be able to recognize that God is there for you.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

Matthew 8:23-27

The Week of April 20th, 2009

1. Monday: The Perfect Storm....Mental, Emotional, Physical, And Spiritual Breakdown

2. TUESDAY: Warning Signs Of Myocardial Infarction (Heart Attack)In Women

3. Wednesday: Mother And Daughter's Relationship

4. Thursday: What Does It Mean To Be Submissive In A Relationship

5. Friday: Do You Know How To Please Yourself And Do You Enjoy Your Body And The Pleasure Of Self Intimacy

Hi Queens, I shorted you last week but I have picked up the pace and the journey continues.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm."....Vincent Lombardt

Are you a good shepard over your finances?

Hi Queens. Okay this is the weak area of in my life (Ha Ha). This will be the shortest blog from me to-date. I have taken steps to resolve my financial issues. I have found that being prayerful and open to sound advice from people of good financial standing (please don't listen to Aunt Bay Bay who had her car repossessd, house foreclosed, or in credit card debt) are just the beginning steps for me.

I have become more aware of my spending habits and have started making good choices of needs vs. wants. If there is a big ticket item that I want, I have now started taking a little from each pay as opposed to buying with one pay or using a credit card. I have paid down half the balance of my existing credit cards. I was told that this along with paying more than the minimal on a timely basis are crucial to good credit reporting.

Okay Queens, I'm not going to belabor the point. Please submit comments and ideas so we can gain control, independence and freedom from debt in our lives.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"Character is what you are in the dark"....Dwight Moody

Annual Pap Smear....The Benefits

Hi Queens. Yes, I said Queens. I have decided that I will address you as the Queens that you truly are. I once mentioned in an earlier blog "It doesn't matter what people call you, what's more important is the name that you answer to". Today, start the mental process of thinking, possessing, living, knowing our worth, and exuding the Queen in you. The definition of exude "To seem to possess; manifest". Try it on for size and feel the comfort. Once you try it, you'll never go back.

Today's blog is annual pap smear and the benefits of having it done. Experts estimate that 35,000,000 women in the United States should have regular Pap smears. About one-third of all women who should have regular Pap smears do not. A pap smear is a procedure that is done by a trained health care professional to screen for cancer of the cervix (the lower part of the uterus).

The Pap smear is a screening technique. It is used to detect cervical cancer or cervical abnormalities that might become cancer in women who don't have any symptoms of these conditions. Experts believe that pap smears should be performed on young women and women if she has reached the age of 18. is sexually active, or has been sexually active. Consult with your OB-GYN if you had a hysterectomy to find out whether it would be advisable for you to continue to have a pap smear. Having Pap smears at recommended intervals is the most important thing a woman can do to protect herself from developing cervical cancer. women who have regular Pap smears are much less likely to develop cervical cancer than are women who don't have the test regularly, because they get early treatment for precancerous conditions.

A woman may need more frequent pap smears if, she has had more than one sexual partner, became sexually active as a teenager, has had an abnormal pap smear, has had a sexually transmitted disease, has had cancer or precancerous tissue growth in the cervix, smokes, has an infection of human papillomavirus (HPV).

Are there activities that a woman should avoid 48 hours prior to have a pap smear? Yes, they are douching, having intercourse, taking a tub bath, swim,using tampons, spermicides, vaginal lubricants, or feminine deodorant sprays or powders. These activities can irritate the cervix. Avoiding them helps ensure collection of an adequate cell sample.

Queens, I will not blog or suggest anything that I am not willing to do myself. It is important that we take care of ourselves and are aware of our bodies. On Tuesday, I had a mammogram. I have not received the results. Prayerfully it is normal. It had been about 3 years since I had my previous one. I vow to follow the advice that I posted about breast cancer screening and having regular breast cancer exams. The Tuesday's health blog topic of the day is to be used as a source of initial introduction to a health issue or to reinforce what knowledge you may already have. This information should not be used as a medical substitute from the sound and professional advice that your physician can offer you. For more indepth information about this subject, please log on to website "http://www.ehealthmd.com/library/papsmear/PAP_whoshould.html

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

When Enough is Enough....No Longer Tolerating And Accepting Substandard Treatment From Men

Ladies my entry today is meant as a wake up call not only for you but for me. I recently enteredinto a new friendship with the hopes that it would mature into a meaningful relationship. After two failed tries, I realized enough is enough. More importantly, I realized that I was not receiving the same attention and commitment that I was giving.

I am a giving person emotionally, mentally and spiritually. I expect, without hesitation, that the same efforts would be reciprocated to me if not more. It pains me to realize that as I mature in age and seek out the companionship of men in their late 40's early 50's, the same old games are still being played. Actually the older the fox/player the better the game is perfected. It's perplexing and mind boggling that at a certain age you would not want a meaningful and engaging relationship with that special person to call your own. I believe in being up front, honest and forthcoming. These attributes are put into place by me to weed out any undesirables and to set the stage/tone from the very start. Unfortunately, if the other person is not of the same mind set to have honesty and true commitment to being forthcoming, then progressing ahead with mutual respect is lost at the start of go. One of the mantra that I subscribe to and live to is "Say what you mean and mean what you say". If I say that I am looking for a serious relationship and not a casual relationship and you tell me that you are looking for casual but intimate relationship, I know not to venture into this situation. You are not going to convince me to change my desire to go casual and I will not waste my time thinking I can magically change your mind to want a serious one-on-one monogamous relationship.

At times, our expectations and willingness to accept crap renders us senseless to make appropriate decisions. Before we can forge a different path to our future you must recognize and know the mistakes of our past. Because when we introspectively analyze and identify why we repeatedly make the wrong choices concerning men, we can then move on to not accepting/tolerating substandard treatment from men.

In our journey and quest to restore self-esteem and confidence to the broken mentality that a lot of women have, be open to the truth, embrace the fragmented pieces and be willing to make changes. Use these questions as a guide when we start this self probe of our hearts and minds. Why do we allow things to spiral out of control before taking action? Why do we ignore and hang on past the warning signs? Why must the house be down to its last charred piece of lumber to realize that the house is burning? Why do we place priority of other's needs, wants and desires before ours? Is the need to be in a relationship greater than the need of self-respect, and most importantly, the overwhelming basic principal of being respected and treated as the queens that we are?

Prayer, time and inner-reflection are the main ingredients to healing and growing. Take the time ladies and invest in you. Don't allow bad experiences to change the nurturing, giving, and loving person you are but, do acquire the gift of discernment and learn who is deserving of you. Make it clear that it is an honor and a privilege to have you, a queen, in his life.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

The Week of April 13th Topics:

Monday: When enough is enough....No longer tolerating substandard
treatment in a relationship

Tuesday: Annual Pap Smears...The Benefits

Wednesday: Are you a good Shepard over your finances

Thursday: The perfect storm....Mental, Emotional, Physical, Spiritual Breakdown

Friday: Do you know how to please yourself and do you enjoy your body
and the pleasure of self intimacy

"A Lot of People Are Lonely Because They Build Walls Instead of Bridges.".....Anonymous

How to Enhance and Keep the Newness in Your Sexual Encounters with Your Partner

Um it's been awhile but the fire is still burning (Ha Ha). Ladies are you now very complaisant in your sexual encounters with your lovers? Do you not dress up for the bedroom? Does your man complain about the boredom in the bedroom? Does he creep? Is he not engaging in long intimate embraces with you? Are your sexual encounters a "Wham, Bam, thank you Ma'am". Well if more than 2 of the above are happening in your life, you have a problem.

Okay now, how do we repair and salvage this despair. I will list some of the suggests that I recently came across in Essence as well as some of my suggestions. Sistahs, please feel free to join in and contribute.

1. Use your car for more than driving

2. Hook up in the hallway

3. Make love to his mind

4. Get on top

5. Initiate the mood

6. A get-away just the two for no reason at all

7. Get ahead of the game, while his favor team is playing, ladies unleash the beast while he is watching T.V. are you good enough to make him forget about LeBron James?

8. Disappear for seven minutes, while at a party sneak away i.e. bathroom, bedroom, closet and see how fast and good you can get him up to the occasion.

9. Text him the most graphic and suggestive message during the day at work and make a date, describe where, how and what you plan to wear.

10. Sex club, go to one as either a participant or a voyageur

I have given some tips now lets get it on. Invite Marvin, Teddy, and Luther. Oh yes ladies this may be the only time that your man won't mind having another man involved.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

If you have a purpose in which you can believe, there's no end to the amount of things you can accomplish....Marian Anderson

Are we raising our daughters to be strong, independent, loving and insightful women

I have two daughters ages 15 and 10. They are totally different in personalities, wants and looks. I have to say, that I don't thank God enough for the opportunity to be their mom. I love them for their individuality, independence, looks, boldness, coyness, intelligence, and their style.

I hope that my daughters are able to take some of my attributes and build upon them. My innate sense of self perseverance, my sense of loyalty to family and friends, my desire to want and to be more than anyone could ever fathom, my internal will to overcome the insurmountable, and my need to love and be loved are attributes that I bestow to them as women. In our efforts to maintain and survive daily @#%#, we become neglectful of our obligation, yes obligation, to show, to teach and to groom our daughters to be better and to want better than our circumstances have afforded us.

There are times that I look at Bria and Mya and I allow myself to vicariously view life from their eyes. The innocence of yesterday, the desire to explore and to discover tomorrow are rekindled within my spirit.

So you see ladies, remember when you reach out to touch a hand, it is the flesh and warmth of that other hand that we embrace and comfort that is soothing to us as well. Allow yourself to help bring a spirit of sistahood and womanhood in our budding flowers. Did you water and shine sunlight on your flower today?

In my quest to mold my daughters to be all they can be, I gain appreciation of their strengths, their weaknesses, and their strong qualities/attributes that they give so willingly to the world. If I could protect them from all the ills of the world, heart break, hurt feelings, and failed relationships I would. I am currently separated and I am so careful about my role as a mother and woman and how these roles are perceived by my daughters. I want them to see the strong woman that I am but I also want them to see me in a loving, caring, thoughtful relationship. I owe them the opportunity to witness a healthy relationship between a man and woman to use as a blueprint and gauge for their relationships in the future.

Today, hug your daughter and tell her why you love her. Make her feel like the earth revolves around her total existence. Make her see and value who she is and how valuable she is to you and others.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

LUPUS

Lupus is a chronic, autoimmune disease that can damage any part of the body (skin, joints, and/or organs inside the body). Chronic is a condition that lasts longer than six weeks and often for many years. In lupus, something goes wrong with your immune system, which is the part of the body that fights off viruses, bacteria, and germs ("foreign invaders," like the flu). Normally our immune system produces proteins called antibodies that protect the body from these invaders. Autoimmune means your immune system cannot tell the difference between these foreign invaders and your body’s healthy tissues ("auto" means "self") and creates autoantibodies that attack and destroy healthy tissue. These autoantibodies cause inflammation, pain, and damage in various parts of the body. There are generally four recognized forms or types of lupus: Cutaneous (skin) Lupus Erythematosus, Systemic Lupus Erythematosus, Drug-induced Erythematosus and Neonatal Lupus.

Here are some facts about lupus:

Lupus is a disease of flares (the symptoms worsen and you feel ill) and remissions (the symptoms improve and you feel better). Lupus can range from mild to life-threatening and should always be treated by a doctor.

Lupus is not contagious, not even through sexual contact.

Lupus is not like or related to cancer.

Lupus is not like or related to HIV (Human Immune Deficiency Virus) or AIDS (Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome).

Research estimates that at least 1.5 million Americans have lupus.

Lupus strikes mostly women of childbearing age (15-44). However, men, children, and teenagers develop lupus, too.

Women of color are 2-3 times more likely to develop lupus.

People of all races and ethnic groups can develop lupus.

What are some of the symptoms of Lupus:

Extreme fatigue, headaches, painful and swollen joints, anemia, swelling (edema) in feet, legs, hands and/or around eyes, pain in chest with deep breathing (pleurisy), butterfly-shaped rash across cheeks and nose, sun and light sensitivity, hair loss, abnormal blood clotting, fingers turning white and/or blue when cold (Raynaud’s phenomenon), mouth and nose ulcers

Lupus is sometimes called "the great imitator" because its symptoms are often like the symptoms of rheumatoid arthritis, blood disorders, fibromyalgia, diabetes, thyroid problems, Lyme disease, and a number of heart, lung, muscle, and bone diseases

Here are some of the risk factors for developing Lupus:

Sex - 90% of people with Lupus are women

Age - Symptoms and diagnosis occur most often when women are in their childbearing years, between the ages of 15 and 44.

Race - In the United States, lupus is more common in people of color -- African Americans, Hispanics/Latinos, Asian Americans, Native Americans, Native Hawaiians and Pacific Islanders

Family history - Relatives of people with lupus have an approximately 5-13 percent chance of developing lupus.

The idea that lupus is generally a fatal disease is a big misconception. In fact, the prognosis of lupus is much better today than ever before. Consult with your family physician if you believe that you are at risk of having Lupus. The form of lupus and its symptoms determine what type of doctor you will see. Your management will enlist a multi layer approach from different specialities depending on the system that is being effected.

The Tuesday's health blog topic of the day is to be used as a source of initial introduction to a health issue or to reinforce what knowledge you may already have. This information should not be used as a medical substitute from the sound and professional advice that your physician can offer you. For additional information, please log onto http://www.lupus.org/ but most importantly, contact your physician. The above information was taken from this site.

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa

"Character is determined by what you accomplish when the excitement is gone."....Anonymous

Settle Vs. Compromise In Our Choices of Men

As you gain maturity and wisdom, you start to reflect on your past mistakes and accomplishments. If you are sincere and honest with yourself, you should be able to learn and to extract the things that were and are mistakes from your life. A sign of wisdom is the ability to recognize these mistakes when presented again into your life. More importantly than recognizing these mistakes are the discernment and maturity not to repeat these mistakes.

I believe that some women are on a perpetual generational odyssey to settle when it comes to choosing men. I recently read the new book out by Steve Harvey "Act like a lady, Think like a man". I concluded that the content was not an epiphany or a revelation but a confirmation. The topics concerning men/women relationships were addressed and presented to enlighten women of our mistakes when dealing with men and how they operate (Excellent reading material). My overall take on this book was the old adage settling vs compromising. Our roles as women are so vast and complicated already, do we have the capacity to add to it by thinking like a man. Yes, added knowledge of knowing what to expect, what to reject and what not to accept are paramount. What is astonishing to me is our continued acceptance of what we know is wrong and our attempt to right these wrongs to have the perfect man.

Do you settle or compromise in our choices of men. Are women still allowing our standards, morals, wants and desires to be "compromised". Ladies comment on your opinions of settle vs. compromise. Are you in a loving relationship where there is compromise or have you settled for the @#%@# for the sake of having a man?

Peace and Blessings,

Tracey ReNissa