In our journey and quest to restore self-esteem and confidence to the broken mentality that a lot of women have, be open to the truth, embrace the fragmented pieces and be willing to make changes. Use these questions as a guide when we start this self probe of our hearts and minds. Why do we allow things to spiral out of control before taking action? Why do we ignore and hang on past the warning signs? Why must the house be down to its last charred piece of lumber to realize that the house is burning? Why do we place priority of other's needs, wants and desires before ours? Is the need to be in a relationship greater than the need of self-respect, and most importantly, the overwhelming basic principal of being respected and treated as the queens that we are?
Monday, April 13, 2009
When Enough is Enough....No Longer Tolerating And Accepting Substandard Treatment From Men
Ladies my entry today is meant as a wake up call not only for you but for me. I recently enteredinto a new friendship with the hopes that it would mature into a meaningful relationship. After two failed tries, I realized enough is enough. More importantly, I realized that I was not receiving the same attention and commitment that I was giving.
I am a giving person emotionally, mentally and spiritually. I expect, without hesitation, that the same efforts would be reciprocated to me if not more. It pains me to realize that as I mature in age and seek out the companionship of men in their late 40's early 50's, the same old games are still being played. Actually the older the fox/player the better the game is perfected. It's perplexing and mind boggling that at a certain age you would not want a meaningful and engaging relationship with that special person to call your own. I believe in being up front, honest and forthcoming. These attributes are put into place by me to weed out any undesirables and to set the stage/tone from the very start. Unfortunately, if the other person is not of the same mind set to have honesty and true commitment to being forthcoming, then progressing ahead with mutual respect is lost at the start of go. One of the mantra that I subscribe to and live to is "Say what you mean and mean what you say". If I say that I am looking for a serious relationship and not a casual relationship and you tell me that you are looking for casual but intimate relationship, I know not to venture into this situation. You are not going to convince me to change my desire to go casual and I will not waste my time thinking I can magically change your mind to want a serious one-on-one monogamous relationship.
At times, our expectations and willingness to accept crap renders us senseless to make appropriate decisions. Before we can forge a different path to our future you must recognize and know the mistakes of our past. Because when we introspectively analyze and identify why we repeatedly make the wrong choices concerning men, we can then move on to not accepting/tolerating substandard treatment from men.
Prayer, time and inner-reflection are the main ingredients to healing and growing. Take the time ladies and invest in you. Don't allow bad experiences to change the nurturing, giving, and loving person you are but, do acquire the gift of discernment and learn who is deserving of you. Make it clear that it is an honor and a privilege to have you, a queen, in his life.
Peace and Blessings,